Excelling as a parent

Dear all,

I am sorry I didn’t post later in the day yesterday as promised, I had a hospital appointment after which I was extremely tired but we thank God! Please forgive me for not posting earlier.

Firstly, I need to share a testimony of one of our readers. This is what she said- 

Praise the lord! our God is a prayer answering God. I have been looking for a child since 2008 and after using prescription drugs etc nothing was working, but i kept praying and declaring the word that i wanted to have children without medical intevention, knowing God can do it. Am not against meedical interventions for having chidren, i just know that God is bigger than medicine, so i kept praying, whilst seeking medical intervention. I was suppose to wait for IUI process and all of a sudden, i realised that i had missed my period, i did a test and it was positive, Praise God!. I thank him for granting me my heart desire according to how i have asked.

Submitted at 7:31am- Please read it here- www.princessofzion.wordpress.com/testimonies/

So, this is part 2 of the series by Rev Funke Adejumo, she actually titled it as “How to excel as a mother”, however she did address both men and women and as such, I modified the title slightly so as not to alienate the men! By the way, even if you are not a parent, this will bless you. You’re still single, please read this to prepare! God will surely bless you. AMEN!

Mark 5

The society believes that children are the leaders of tomorrow but contemporary research in Psychology states that children are the leaders of today. Whatever values to fail to instil in them will stunt their leadership traits in future. Leadership traits are imbibed in them between 0-18 years old! Every moral, Biblical or societal norm you want to imbibe in them should done between these ages, otherwise, they may never be able to get them again without divine intervention.

A preserved childhood is better than a repaired adulthood. Therefore you must invest time in your children. You have 4 types of children.

1- Biological- The ones you gave birth to.

2- Natural- The ones that are married to your children.

3- Adopted- People that look up to you sometimes even without your knowledge.

4- Spiritual- The ones you mentor spiritually.

May you not be barren in any area of your life. Amen. You must understand that you belong to a family. The man and the woman must both be involved in the raising of your child; your child is an extension of your life; the generation of your child will either bless you or curse you depending on what you give to them. Many spouses are cursing their mothers-in-law, may that not be your portion. Rev Funke started praying for her kids even before she was married. “Every child that will ever lie in my womb will depopulate Hell. Every child that will ever suck on my breasts will honour God”

1- You must be a grateful parent.

Your child is a blessing in your life. It is a privilege and an honour to be called daddy or mummy. In the kingdom of God there are no achievers but receivers. It is a privilege for you to be blessed by God. Whatever you give thanks for can never die. Each time they bring their report cards home, gather the whole family to thank God. “Father I thank you for this report card, who am I to say I am even a parent”. Teach your children to be grateful by showing them your own gratitude. Whatever you thank God for can never die. Stop complaining that you don’t have sons, we can’t manufacture children. Be grateful to the Lord for whatever you have, you must be a grateful parent.

2- Where are the fathers?

When Jairus’ daughter was ill, it was the father that got up out of the house to look for a solution? Where are the fathers? Many of the fathers are absentee fathers, when last did you carry your children on your shoulders? Some of you, your children come up to you to for hugs and you say you are too busy. Where are the fathers? Many fathers today sexually abuse their children, beat their wives? One of the greatest gifts you can give your children is to love their mother. Treat her ith dignity and respect. Children don’t have eject buttons, they think whatever you do is the right thing. Let your children have a good memory of you, when you leave the house, do you give the mother a kiss? Fathers rise up and look for solutions. Where are the fathers?

3- Introduce your God to your children very early in life!

Proverbs 22:6- Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.

God has no grand children, lead your children to the Lord by yourself. Give each of them a Bible and let them write and sign their salvation day at the back of the Bible. It is important that they have a sound and dynamic spiritual life. Pray with them, let them see you read the Bible, let them see you do family alters. Fathers don’t leave it to your wife! It will give you peace, when last did you have a prayer meeting or bible study day. Have a family night every week where you can speak and they can ask you questions. Be free with them and open, teach them about virginity, puberty and sex! If you don’t teach them, the television will! They will thank God for you. When a marriage breaks, the roof over child’s life is removed! Psychology has discovered that whoever is a product of a broken marriage has a 99% chance of having a broken marriage. Don’t let your children have step mothers, ten eyes are not better than your own. Every Jairus must wake up! Father’s don’t leave a vacuum in your family. If your Christianity does not work at home, don’t bother to export it!

4- Be an example of your spouse and show it!

Love your wife and show you children. How dare you lay your hands on your wife? Don’t beat your wife or husband! Be loving to your spouse in front of your children.

5- The fifth point is particularly for the women. Mothers, don’t let what your husband committed into your hands die!

A business, a child, a property, a ministry a department? Don’t let that child die! Some of us are too busy, with Church work, business and we don’t know whats happening in their lives! When your child complains, don’t shut them up, listen! A 5 year old girl was complaining that she didn’t want to go to school, the mother kept shutting her up. It was later discovered that she was sexually abused daily by the driver who takes he to school. When your child is complacent and closing up, listen, find out what the matter is! You are losing hat child, don’t let that child die in your hands! Whatever your husband has committed to your hands, don’t let it die! Labour in prayer over your children, if there are certain hereditary factors that run in your family, it may be an illness or negative behaviour, pray against it! Start praying for your children! Have a set time where you pray for your children, so your children will not fall victim to it. AMEN. Spend time to pray for your children! A child that is prayed for is a winning child

6- Befriend your children!

This is an important point; for parents and single people alike. In your life as a parent, there are just three seasons; no more no less.

In the first season, you are in charge of the child’s life! You tell them to sit, they sit! You send them to a particular School they have to go! Enjoy it while it lasts because it will soon end.

In the second season, the child is now in charge of his life- How many of you have to seek permission from your parents to travel or to read this blog? You are now in charge of your life.

In the third season, the child is now in charge of their life and your’s- They will tell their spouse, how you treated them and you will be treated in the same way! How you manage the first season, determines what you will enjoy in the third season; so, manage it well.

A season comes in life when your child is no longer a child but now your friend. Know when your children becomes you friend and when they need your respect. Don’t embarrass them in front of their friends.

What do you say to your children? Pastor EA Adeboye said when he was little, his mother proclaimed over him that when he calls one person, a hundred will answer! And true to her word, today when he calls, thousands answer. Declare great things over your children. Give them great and prophetic nicknames; you can call them Kingdom financiers, doctors, prophets, tell them they will save their generation and so on.

Mother of nations, what do you say to your children! Bless your children, make sure that words of life come out of your mouth! When your kids are still young, as a mother as a father, bless them, speak life over them! Pray for them, anoint them, lay hands on them, pray over their pictures! As a woman, touch your tummy or breast; they are your communication gadgets that your husband doesn’t have. You pray some prayers and the devil knows that he can never touch your own! Build confidence into your children! Tell them not to be proud but never to walk with their head down! Tell them to be proud that they are Christians, be proud that they carry your name! Be proud that you are a child of God, a believer! If your child is fat, don’t abuse or put them down! If they most lose weight, go for walks with them! Validate them! Exercise with them! Bless them; let them know they are important, don’t let them lose their self esteem! All the things you endured, don’t let them go through them. When they come home with their report cards, don’t look for the Fs. Look for the good grades and encourage them! Spend time with your children. Know your child! Understand that they are growing. One may be good at Maths, the other may not! Don’t compare your children! He may not be good at Maths; what about Art? Don’t kill your child’s dreams, for example Mike Murdock was chastised for talking too much but today that same mouth feeds him! Let your child talk; that may be what will feed him and you, not the maths that he studied!

7- Love your child!

When last did you write a letter to your child proclaiming how much you love and cherish them? Love your child and let the child know! Hug your child! Know your child and train your child!

Whether you are single or married, pray this prayer- Each child that I have, each of them will prosper, they will not beg from themselves! I shall not be barren, my children shall not be barren! In the evening of my life, I shall have peace! No matter what they become, they will serve God! Nothing shall stop them! Where I finished, shall be their starting point! Generations shall bless my household, generations shall bless my children. My children shall be a blessing, what kills their mates, will never kill my children! Each of my children will prosper, no matter how many they are! No matter the number I have, they will serve God! On their day of joy, nobody will represent me! None of my children will marry the wrong person! In the evening of my life, you will have rest!

Everyone believing God for the fruit of the womb, this time next year you will sing for joy! Tap into the testimony of the reader above and God will do it for you. All those who are not married, God will surprise you. Every storm in your home, be still! It is well with you! This will be the best of your years. AMEN!!

Thank You Lord! I pray this has blessed all the parents in the house and even those still waiting on the fruit of the womb! God bless and prosper you all. AMEN.

To listen to the message or to access other sermons from the conference and from Daystar, please visit this link: http://lifestream.tv/daystar/

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7 Comments

Filed under Marriage/Courtship, Parenting, Testimonies, Uncategorized

7 responses to “Excelling as a parent

  1. I simply want to mention I am very new to blogs and honestly loved you’re web site. Almost certainly I’m planning to bookmark your website . You absolutely come with fabulous article content. Cheers for sharing with us your web page.

  2. idara imoh

    Gudevning princess.I’m a single of 29yrs old,nd a guy whose wife died 2yrs ago just proposed 2 me,I haven’t giving him an answer though,nd I just finishd reading what u have up there,hw do I realy excell 1ith d 3kids dats not mine?bcos I realy wana treat those kids as if they r mine,pls can u throw more light on hw i can go about it?

    • Dear Idara,

      You are welcome in Jesus’ Name. Please excuse the late response! Congratulations on your proposal, pray about it and ask yourself the important questions? Was God leading you two? Is he a genuine born again? Are you equally yoked? Compatible? Is he someone you like and will love? Is he the one you want to spend the rest of your life with and be a help meet to? What is his true character? May the Lord give you wisdom and direction. Amen.

      Regarding his three children; there is only one truth! If you marry this man, the two of you become one! Everything you have is his, everything he has is your’s including those three children! Don’t see it any other way, see them as yours. You may not have given birth to them but treat them like yours. Every guideline in this, apply it to them but even with more energy and love. Think about it this way- these three young kids lost their mother; they must feel helpless and miss her. Growing up without a mother can be difficult and traumatising; ask that the Lord comfort and strengthen them and ask that the Lord give you the grace to mother them the way He would have it.

      The key point is- do NOT treat them like they are adopted or step children. Treat them like your’s and call them yours. You and the father should talk about the children, what is their routine, what should they call you? Mum or what? Don’t inflict anything on them that they won’t be comfortable with; if they feel better calling you mum, let them. If they don’t, don’t force them! Give them love, treat them like your own. Pray for them always, pray with them always. As a family, together! Talk to them as a mother, let them confide in you. Give them hugs, cuddles and encouragement. Always pray for God to guide your relationship with them.

      Congratulations Idara, I pray God will give you wisdom and guidance. If this marriage is His will, He will give you peace and a sufficient amount of grace to mother the children He has blessed you with. Amen. Please keep in touch and let us know how you get on. God bless, keep, favour, strengthen, uphold and prosper you in Jesus’ Name. Amen.

    • Sorry, let me add that you need to tread carefully. Obviously, you don’t know their character traits yet. Some may be private, others outgoing. So, you need to approach and treat each of them differently. You must also appreciate and respect the fact that you coming in is going to be a huge change for them (some may see it as negative, others may see it as positive). How old are they by the way? There are many notions of step mothers being wicked; so they may be very apprehensive, sad and angry, or they may be too young to know. It all depends on their age, personality and character. As such, you need to discuss with the father, observe them, pray very fervently and approach softly. Before the marriage/moving it, it is important that the dad introduces you to them, sits down and explains the change that will occur. E.g

      Children, this is Miss Idara, she’s a wonderful friend of daddy’s. Daddy will like to marry her and after the marriage, she will come and live with us. She will help us out by taking care of daddy and making sure daddy is okay, she will help you get ready for school, help with your homework, cooking etc (He knows his kids, so he should say the things that they will like to hear but are true). E.g if they’ve been looking for someone to drive them to the swimming, he can say that the two of you will do that. But it is important that he speaks to them, introduces you and explain to them what it’s going to be like. It will give them time to adjust to the new situation and can even get them excited about you. Amen.

  3. idara imoh

    Wao!princess thnx a whole lot 4 d reply,yes he’s a born again christain nd we’r compatible nd can spend d rest of my life with him,nd d eldest of dem is just 7yrs old.

    • Wonderful! May the Lord lead the two of you according to His will and bless your union! Amen!

      The children are still young and so will be more receptive than older kids, but these are their formative years; so you really need to be a hands on parent! Another added bonus is that you are old enough to be their mother; so they should respect you as such.

      Will be praying for you, your soon-to-be husband and the children. Did you get/read my response about the issue of sex?

  4. idara imoh

    I’ll always kip in touch,also alwayz put me in ur prayers let God bless him financially so we can formalize it in Gods way!thnx nd God.

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