Keeping my marriage alive

Good day all,

I expect that you are all having a wonderful weekend and enjoying your Saturday; I certainly am! My day has been glorious; filled with good news, praise and worship to the King of Kings, Bible study and now it is time to blog! Okay, well I do know that we have many married people in the house! God bless you all! I am aware that I may not have done much to address you but today, may God help me to do that!

I would first of all like to say a prayer for all the married people and those about to get married.

Prayer for you

In Jesus’ Name, Amen! Father I thank you for these princes and princesses of Zion who are married and about to get married! I thank you for the privilege to be found and to have a life partner! I glorify Your holy Name on their behalf and bless You Heavenly Father! Lord, be with them! Cover their marriages, homes, families and loved ones with your precious blood! Anoint their marriages with your grace, power, mercy, favour and love! Honour Your word which says- Two are better than one for they have a good reward for their labour (Ecclesiastes 4:9)! Father, return great rewards to them for their labour! Lord, we thank You for your word says that he that find a wife, finds a good thing and obtains favour from the Lord (Proverbs 18:22). Oh Lord, let your divine favour fall on and rest upon them right now and forever more! Let their joy be full, to every reader of this blog and every believer, Lord, let their marriages NEVER end in divorce, separation or unhappiness! Let none of these readers be widowed at an untimely age, but Lord, let these couples continue to grow in love and strength for one another, give them the grace and resources to raise Godly seed and you bless them with the fruit of the womb and let them see their children be successful, let them witness their children marry and see their grand children and great grand children! May their marriages be protected and preserved from adultery, poverty, sickness, division, jezebels and so on! But Lord, make their marriages a testimony of your Holiness and your mercy! AMEN!

I prophecy that your marriage will be infectious! People will see you and see God’s love! To the singles, the widowed or the separated, may God also change your marital statuses this season! AMEN! Father you said- it is not good for man to be alone (Genesis 2:18), Lord please divinely direct their Godly spouses to them and let them formalise their union the Godly way this season in Jesus’ Name. AMEN. For those seeking reconciliation Lord, do it for them.

How to keep your marriage alive! This is a collation from Christian seminars, sermons and so on, the principles will be based on Scripture. 

1- Genesis 2:18- “Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.”

Marriage was God’s idea not man! God is the author of marriage, not man! If you buy a Ford car, you certainly can’t service or operate it based on the manual of a Toyota car. In other words, build and care for your marriage based on the manual of God and God alone- the Bible. Yourself and your spouse should read the Bible and see what God says about marriage. He has simples commandments. Follow and obey them. You can’t go wrong!

Honour God in all! Don’t get lost in your marriage, still go to Church weekly, still attend midweek services, don’t stop serving in Church. Why not continue to give your time to God? Always pay your tithes together and don’t cut corners, sow seeds into the Kingdom TOGETHER!

2- Mark 10:11-12- He told them, “Whoever divorces his wife and marries someone else commits adultery against her. 12 And if a woman divorces her husband and marries someone else, she commits adultery.”

Before you get married, you both need to decide that divorce is not an option for you no matter how things get. Make this vow to each other and even in the middle of crises, reaffirm this to yourself. If you both know you are in it till death do you part, you will be forced to work it out. AMEN.

3-Amos 3:3- Can two walk together, except they be agreed?

Have a family vision for your marriage. Why are you married? What is the objective? As a married couple, what do you hope to achieve? You may want to eradicate poverty, or empower the youths in your country or be motivated to see more Godly marriages rise up, or you may want to stand against divorce, or go into politics to save your country. It doesn’t matter how big or small, have a vision and agree on it and work towards it together! This will empower you to see the bigger picture, so even when you face conficts, your selfish desires wont get the better of you but you will be dedicated to making it work for your vision.

4- Matthew 18:19-19 Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.

Even Deutoronomy 32:30 says 1 will chase a thousand, two will chase ten thousand! One of the greatest assets you have is your spouse! Stand in agreement in all things, pray together! Always pray with your spouse, at least twice a day and even when you’re not together, pray for him/her. Whatever battles they face, is now your battle too! Praying together brings you closer and continuously solidifies your union! Even when you face conflicts, pray together, you’ll find that, you’ll forget the issue before you’ve even finished the prayer. 

5- Matthew 6:12-Forgive us our sins,
as we have forgiven those who sin against us.

You may hurt each other, you may argue, there may be conflict! Whatever it is learn to forgive and give it a clean slate! You are married for life! You cant live with strife and malice forever, it may consume you! Realise that your spouse is a human being and forgive each other! Also make an effort not to hurt one another! Always pray to God for the grace to continue to love one another, forgive each other and do as He commands.

 6– 1st Corinthains 7:3-5: The husband should fulfill his wife’s sexual needs, and the wife should fulfill her husband’s needs. The wife gives authority over her body to her husband, and the husband gives authority over his body to his wife.

Do not deprive each other of sexual relations, unless you both agree to refrain from sexual intimacy for a limited time so you can give yourselves more completely to prayer. Afterward, you should come together again so that Satan won’t be able to tempt you because of your lack of self-control

When you are married, be open with your spouse, even the Bible has commanded that you satisfy each other! My Pastor once said that if a man eats at home and is full, he wont eat outside because he knows when he returns home, he will have more to eat! That says it all. Many women today use sex as a weapon or reward for their husbands. Please don’t do this, it is fraud (1 Corinthians 7:5)! Give yourselves freely and happily to each other and remember you will be married for a very long time! Keep things interesting! Keep your bodies fit and it good shape, always look/feel clean and fresh! Buy and wear nice lingerie for your husbands! When you become a wife or mother, it doesn’t mean you should become frompy! God created sex to unite married couples, for them to enjoy and celebrate their love! It is such a powerful tool for keeping a couple together! Use it to the best of your ability! Pastor Paul of House on the Rock suggested that married couples have specific “sex days”. E.g thw wife’s sex day comprises of what exactly she wants: how/when/where, while the husband has his for what/how/where he wants. Keep things exciting and fresh! Sex is to be enjoyed and not endured! It should be kept between husband and wife; so don’t commit adultery either.

I also suggest that married couples have at least one “date night” a week where they go out on their own, no kids no friends. Just the two of them spending time with each other! Also spend time with other Godly married couples at least once a month, where it further cements the importance and beauty of the marriage institution. Please, just as you remember and celebrate your birthday annually, do the same with your wedding anniversary! Always rededicate your marriages to God yearly, thank Him for yet another year and spend some intimate time with each other! If you can afford it, take a yearly trip to celebrate your anniversary

7- Genesis 2:24- Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh.

You are married now, this is your new family! Your new family now takes priority over the old! Yes, you’ve known them from birth but when you get married, you must realize this! Do not negect your old family but priortize this one! Women, don’t make it a habit to run back to your mother to report any cnflict or wrong doing that may have taken place. Make your decisions together, handle conflict together! Do not get family involved unless absolutely critical, in which case you can get your spiritual parents involved i.e Pastors.

Also, you become ONE flesh! You are no longer two separate entities! Plan and live your lives that way. Make all your decisions together, plan your holidays, your future together, never make separate decisions and be open with one another! Grant each other access to your phones, emails and everything! There should be no secrets. Your spouse should be your best friend, treat them that way! Don’t let anything come between you.

8- Malachi 2:14- You cry out, “Why doesn’t the Lord accept my worship?” I’ll tell you why! Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows.

Many men suffer afflictions and failure in their jobs, careers and businesses because they do not treat their wives with reverence. No matter what you are going through, never treat your husband or wife badly! It is not right! God himself has said he may not accept your worship. Be faithful to your spouse, do not get involved intimately either emotionally or physically with anyone else!

To conclude, I will leave you with my favourite Scripture on marriage! This is what God wants marriage to be ideally- The husband as the head; loving his wife and the wife as his help meet submitting to, respecting and obeying her husband! Loving each other and caring for one another. AMEN. Be romantic, men cook for your wives once in a while, surprise her! Women, why not take him out for a change and buy him a special gift? Keep the marriage full of God, love,  surprises, romantic getaways, prayers, gifts and more God! God bless you all.

9- Ephesians 5:21-33- And further, submit to one another out of reverence for Christ.

For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. 24 As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.

For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body.

As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.”This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one. So again I say, each man must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband.




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Filed under Keeping my marriage alive, Marriage/Courtship, Prayer

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